So here it is....the exciting conclusion of our love story. Of course, our love story will continue and, in reality, these 5 parts have only been the beginning. I am excited to experience life with Jim and create many more memories that will add to our love story. (Don't worry though...Jim won't actually write it out anytime soon!)
As I sat there listening to Lisa talk about her marriage enrichment evening, it confirmed in my mind everything I knew about how special she is. Yes, I thought I still had questions, but all the prayers and all my mom's help talking through my discernment with me had really led me close to a decision. And, before I knew it, I found myself saying those fateful words to Lisa, "Let's date!"
Lisa thought I was joking. "Very funny!" she said. I had to tell her three times before she actually took me seriously. You see, she was beginning to think I was never going to come to a decision. It was understandable that she was questioning my sincerity. When she finally realized I was being serious, she immediately went from surprise, to shock, to pure joy. We had already hung up on skype and were instant messaging, so she asked me to call her back and tell her in person.
I dialed immediately and "officially" asked her to be my girlfriend. She was so excited. And anyone who knows Lisa can probably guess her next words, "Can we make this facebook official?" I told her, "Sure." And, once I knew it was on Facebook, I knew there was no going back.
That night we talked about making plans for me to come and see her. It had been 9 months since we had last seen each other. We both were a little nervous about it. Our conversations still flowed so wonderfully, but we couldn't help but wonder if our connection in person would still be there as well.
Throughout Lent, Lisa and I talked a lot about how making a commitment in a relationship was giving someone your whole heart. For a long time, I had wanted to give her my heart in this way, but with all of my questions I was never able to do it. I knew I wanted to symbolically show her somehow that I was now ready to make this commitment. Both Lisa and I love the color blue, so I decided to try to find a ring (her favorite piece of jewelery) that represented both my heart and the color blue.
I eventually found the perfect ring. It was a white gold ring in the shape of a heart with a lovely sapphire in the center. I purchased it just in time to get on a plane to see her again in late May. In the meantime, Lisa had kept telling me about a surprise she had for me. We both had talked about having a sentimental moment together to talk about our new relationship in person, and little did I know that Lisa had the perfect place in mind for this moment to happen.
When I landed at the airport, I saw Lisa waiting for me in the same spot she was waiting for me all those months ago. She looked even better than I remembered. After crossing the border, Lisa showed me her surprise. I found myself sitting with her on the very same swing at the retreat house where she had her spiritual message from God (which I talked about WAY back in part one!). Long ago, she asked God for direction on being open to long distance relationships, and His revelation to her led her to me. And now, as we sat together, it was hard not to feel God's hand in this moment. I knew that this was the perfect place to give her the ring. As I placed it on her finger, I told her that she now--finally--had my whole heart. It was a very happy and memorable moment for both of us.
We had an amazing weekend together, and it led to our next big adventure. We both had decided the night we "officially" started dating that a trip to Niagara Falls would be very romantic, and a great way to see how we would do as a couple planning a trip and being alone together (without family around) for a couple of days. I planned to spend a week in Canada in June, with two days of that week spent in Niagara Falls.
We had a great time planning the trip....wait, who am I kidding, Lisa planned the whole thing! But it was an amazing time. We did so many fun things together, and since I had never been to the Falls before, it was even more special for me. I couldn't decide which was more beautiful, the Falls....or my amazing girlfriend [Lisa, you are MY "Maid of the Mist"!].
And the trip turned out great. We never had any arguments or disputes about where to go, or what to do next. (Well, the fact that Lisa had everything planned out didn't hurt... ;) ). We got along very well and enjoyed every moment together. And as we checked out of our hotel (separate rooms, of course!), we knew that this was a big sign that we could successfully spend a lifetime together.
Lisa then came up to visit me in Minnesota. But first, she spent a couple days in Chicago, where we got to spend another 4th of July together under the fireworks! And let's not forget the most amazing experience of her life...seeing U2 live in concert!!! (The "most amazing experience" part is my words, not hers...unfortunately. ;) ).
Lisa loved Minnesota. We had a great time there attending a friend's wedding, going out to a nice dinner, and especially seeing the Mall of America! (Yes, this time those ARE her sentiments!) She kept saying, "This looks just like Ontario", but in my opinion, it's Ontario that looks like Minnesota. ;)
Lisa also really liked my house and said that she could easily picture herself living there. This was important because we had previously agreed that these two weeks (one for the Falls trip and one in Minnesota) were going to be "discernment weeks" for us. We knew that, being a long-distance couple, we needed some extended periods of time together develop our relationship in person. By spending these two weeks together (much of it alone), we decided that we really could make this relationship work--and work wonderfully!
And so, it was time to really start thinking seriously about our future together. Ironically, at this exact time, a friend at work had just proposed to his girlfriend and was talking to me about a book they had read called, "101 Questions to Ask Before You Get Engaged". I told him I would love to borrow it to discuss it with Lisa. He happened to have it right there in the office that day and loaned to me on the spot!
This book began the final phase of our discernment together. We went over the questions in the book and had some long discussions. And yes, we even had some more arguments. I knew that I loved Lisa and wanted to be with her, but I still had some lingering doubts about whether I was REALLY making the right decision, and if I could handle everything that could possibly happen in a marriage. I talked about it with a lot of different people, and they all said that you can NEVER know for sure what will happen. And of course, Lisa had been telling me this same thing all along. This reality finally started to sink into my thick head!
And then in August, I got very ill with mono. Lisa was very concerned and worried about me. She checked up on me all the time and gave me all her love and support from 800 miles away. (Not to mention researching everything there ever was to know about mono and sharing her "expert" opnions.) She was so concerned about me that she was almost ready to get on a plane and fly to MN to take care of me! I was so blown away by how much she loved me and wanted to take care of me. Not that I didn't know it before, but now it was made so clear by how much she sincerely wanted to take away all my pain if she could.
At this point, after all that had happened...I FINALLY knew. This was the woman God had put in my life to take care of me, to lead me to holiness, and to help show me the meaning of true self-giving. I was finally ready to "get off the couch"! As soon as I made this decision, and ever since then, I have felt nothing but peace and joy about having Lisa in my life. I knew then what I had to do. I went into a jewelery store [and yes, this was at the last minute] and asked them, "Is there any possible way you can have a ring ready for me by Labor Day?"....
Jim thinks this is another one his "amazing" cliffhangers, but he forgets that you already know the engagement story. I wrote all about it in the "My Canadian Girl" post. So there you have it: our love story. It is not conventional, but it is ours and we love it. I hope you enjoyed reading it. Now, maybe I can get back to writing my own blog ;)
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